Mini Milestones

I was reading my monthly Parents magazine this morning with my coffee (while my daughter slept until 9...God bless her), and there was an article on ‘mini-milestones’. The writer pointed out that amid the bigger milestones like first steps and first birthdays (which will inevitably include millions of pictures, crazy grandparent excitement, and a waterfall of emotions for one proud mama), “there are also many powerful little milestones that sneak up on you. Often you don’t realize you have encountered one until it is taking your breath away--or slipping past so fast you don’t notice you’re missing it.” 

Well, my breath got taken away this week by one such “mini-milestone”. We went to Harper’s four month check up and got the go-ahead to start solids with her. Great. Sounds like fun and a complete disaster at the same time. We had the new high chair, the right spoons, bright little bowls with fishies on them, and made a special trip to the store for the perfect, doctor recommended rice cereal. 

This is her "You want me to do WHAT with the WHAT?" face...

Neal claimed first feed, and I relunctantly agreed. However, I morphed into control freak mode as soon as it was time, and Neal got the message loud and clear when I snapped at him, “This is a BIG deal for me!” Yikes. Needless to say, he took over the roll as photographer and videographer so I could have this moment feeding my daughter for the first time. 

We were right: it was a complete disaster, and wildly hilarious at the same time. The cereal was like water, and out of a dozen or so spoonfuls, I’d say half of one may have stayed in the mouth. 

But it was afterwards that I had to go have a moment alone to process this “mini-milestone”. When did I get a child old enough to sit in a high chair and eat from a spoon? Where did my baby go that used to lay in one spot, loved to be held, and stared longingly into my eyes while she nursed? The time spent feeding her before was “our” time...bonding with each other like only a mother/child can. Now I have this sweet, precious girl who is rolling all over the place, hates the very swaddle that kept her safe and warm for the first three months of her life, and couldn’t care less about bonding with mom over “lunch and dinner” (there are exciting noises, colors, and new distractions that turn those lunches and dinners into outright nursing strikes). 

It's a conundrum though for a new mom, these milestones--big or small. You want your baby to be "advanced", to reach every milestone when the books say she will (or before). And all the while you're thinking, She hasn't rolled over yet...the neighbor's kid rolled over two weeks ago...she's not grabbing at anything...what's wrong with her? And then all of a sudden she rolls over/grabs something/eats from a spoon and you're left with the feeling that time is going too damn fast. 

Just for a moment this week, I needed time to stand still. I needed to cradle my baby a little longer at night while she drifted off to sleep. I know I have to accept the fact that before too long she’ll be crawling, and walking, and talking (yes, I realize I'm jumping the gun a little, but it crosses my mind every day). Don’t get me wrong...I’m so excited about those big milestones. Heck, I was excited about this mini one...I just didn’t realize how much it was going to take my breath away. And I pray that I have the presence of mind throughout Harper’s life to not let the other mini-milestones “slip past so fast I don’t even notice them.”

Another "mini-milestone": she can sit up unassisted for a few seconds now...such a big girl!